SHIVA DRISHTI
One of my favorite yoga practices is Shiva Drishti. The word drishti is usually translated as "gaze" or "to look upon". Shiva is the manifestation or energy of transformation, the power to bring forth wondrous, beautiful creations from the lowliest, most common, even reviled things or circumstances. Shiva is the fire that can turn common metal into brilliant gold. Shiva is the dancer, never standing still, always celebrating with passion and exuberance, this wild and strange life we've found ourselves in.
So Shiva Drishti means "to gaze with the eyes of Shiva" or to see your world through the eyes of shimmering possibility, delighting in drawing forth the gold from the most unlikely of places. Like all of yoga, it is a practice, a discipline. How much easier it often is to see what we don't like about life, to notice the dirt and grime and meanness and lack of beauty, in both our surroundings and the way people treat each other. But yoga tells us that where the gaze goes, the attention follows, and where the attention goes, the energy follows. So if we consistently gaze upon what is negative and dispiriting, our attention is taken up by that, and soon our energy is consumed by it until all the world begins to seem ugly and unkind and filled with mean-spirited people who don't care about anyone else. We call this cynicism. Some people say it's just being "realistic." On the other hand, if we choose to gaze through the eyes of Shiva, then we begin to notice what is good and wonderful and beautiful, even in places or people that before seemed petty or ugly or just plain uninteresting.
I recently had an experience that perfectly illustrated the power of Shiva Drishti. Part of the community outreach program of our center has led to my beginning to teach yoga and stress reduction to the residents of a domestic violence shelter here in Crown Heights. For a couple of hours every other week, I go to a dingy basement room with harsh fluorescent lights, and try to help these women to find some comfort and relief within themselves, despite the terribly stressful circumstances they find themselves in. Then we give the women a break from the pressures of caring for their (equally distressed) children, and I play yoga, dance and movement games with the kids for a while.
The day of my first class with them, I had been caught up in a familiar scenario of my mind. I come from a large Midwestern family, where everyone lives in big old houses with big yards and plenty of room for everyone to spread out. I've lived in New York for over 25 years, but I still carry that inside me and I struggle from time to time with what I call the "not-enough" feeling. As we know, living space in the city comes at a high price. Now, my family and I live in a lovely two bedroom apartment in a great neighborhood (Prospect Heights), but I can get caught in this feeling of "it's not enough - if only I had... fill in the blank - another room, a yard, a terrace." I think you get the picture.
So I went to teach in this shelter and was so deeply moved by the haunted eyes of the women and especially the children, and then walked home slowly along Eastern Parkway, taking comfort in the beautiful tall trees and the exuberance of so many children playing out on the wide sidewalk. And when I walked into my home it seemed to me a palace! It was as if I had never seen it before. The rooms seemed so spacious and elegant. The wide windows opening to such a beautiful, airy view. Even the scattered toys around the edges of the rooms that so often irritate me, looked beautiful and poignant - the toys of children who have a home and a mother and father who love and care for them, and work hard to keep them safe and nurtured. Had my apartment changed in the three hours that I was gone? Obviously not. What had changed was me, or more specifically, my eyes. My eyes had been washed clean by the encounter, and I was now seeing through the eyes of Shiva. Everything looked beautiful and wondrous and miraculous even.
So here is a practice that can bring great rewards. The magic of this is that nothing needs to change in our life for us to find happiness and beauty - nothing. It is always right here, right in front of us, in the things that we so often overlook, or look at with dissatisfaction or even disgust. Even in the most trying circumstances, there is a way that we can look out onto the world and find peace. After leading the session with the women at the shelter (none of whom had ever been exposed to yoga or any form of deep relaxation before), many of the women got up from the final savasana and looked at me in a kind of confused wonder. Their eyes were soft and their faces looked relaxed and peaceful. When I said our time was over, several of them said, "oh no, can't we do some more!" They all seemed completely amazed that they could actually experience a few moments of peace, given the circumstances they were living through. And I tried to explain to them the central teaching of yoga, which is just that. That no matter what is going on around you, inside there is a deep well of peace and contentment that can never be destroyed. Never. No matter what happens to you in your life, no matter how you think you've blown it, ruined your chances for happiness, ruined your life by your choices, or had your life ruined by circumstances beyond your control. Who you really are is always there, waiting for your return.
Shiva Drishti. Whenever I reflect deeply on this practice, I am always reminded of that great old hymn "Amazing Grace." Shiva Drishti will bring us to that place of grace and ease with our lives, so that we can feel the deep truth of the words... "I once was lost, but now I'm found... was blind, but now I see."
May you see through the eyes of Shiva. May your world be transformed as your eyes are washed clean. May you be peaceful. May you be happy. May you be free.
Om Shanti.
-- Cathy, 2003